my life as a artist
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Thursday 13th November 2008 6:24 PM
Hello everybloggy! On Monday night I ordered a special tomato and cheese and ordinary tomato pizza from Modigliani's, which was delivered on a moped, twenty minutes later, by the owner's daughter, Brenda. Noticing some of my artworks in the conservatory, she asked me if, as a commission, I'd consider painting her in the nude. At first I refused, on the grounds that I'd get too cold and would have nowhere to put my brushes, but then she explained that she wanted a picture of herself naked, to give as a present to her boyfriend, for which she was willing to give me twenty-five special tomato and cheese and ordinary tomato pizzas, spaced out at regular and suitable intervals. Having established that the intervals were of time rather than physical distance, I agreed.
She came round for a sitting yesterday lunchtime, and I painted while we both listened, entranced, to 'You and yours' on Radio 4. Although an attractive young woman, the fact that Brenda was a radical atheist, carnivore and Leeds United supporter meant that I could work untroubled by erotic desire, and the painting was finished, if not before the end of 'The World at One', certainly before the end of the world. Brenda and her boyfriend are really pleased with it, although I'm not convinced. I reckon I've got some way to go before I could produce anything as good as Venus Celli's Botti.
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