my life as a artist

aquariums

Friday 13th February 2009 1:38 AM

This coming Saturday morning I'm reliably informed that the moon is in the seventh house and Jupiter aligns with Mars. If this is the case, then fairly soon afterwards, I'd expect love to start guiding the planets and peace to steer the stars, proving once and for all that the 5th Dimension, although kinkily dressed and preposterously big-haired, are real. The alignment will last for eighteen minutes, starting at 7:25 am, and it's our job as co-creators (which bit did you make?) to generate a wave a wave a wave of love and good intention towards the planet during that cosmic opening. Recently I've been struggling with bad thoughts about Richard Dawkins, so I'm going to walk through that door of opportunity and thank him for the creative friction he's brought to my life, and abandon my long-held fantasy that one day he might be a pannelist on Question Time and spontaneously combust.

I, for one, would be glad of a benign impulse from the cosmos as I've been feeling a bit woolly lately. Last week I took the Mazda in to have the points set, and I mentioned my recent lassitude to Ray the mechanic, and he offered to take a look at my pineal gland. A lot of mechanics would offer you religion or an injection of unknown pharmaceuticals, but Ray's old school. It turns out that my pineal gland was starting to calcify, and Ray said that was probably due to a build up of fluoride. As he rubbed my hypothalamus down with an oily rag, he explained that the pineal gland absorbed more fluoride than any other gland and that's what would explain my general apathy. According to the German and Russian armies who gave it to prisoners of war, it's a useful toxin for making people docile and stupid.

It was comforting to see my tiny pineal gland, looking for all the world like a grain of wild rice, lying in a shallow saucer of 'lime-away' on Ray's work-bench, and as the encrustations of material darkness dissolved into light, his rough Yorkshire tones took on a diaphanous, lyrical quality, as he explained the importance of keeping a clean pineal gland. I can't remember the details, probably because my organ of creative perception was lying in a shallow bowl of 'lime-away', but the main tips were drink spring water, practise meditation, be kind to pre-pubertal gerbils and don't listen to Chris Moyles breakfast show on Radio 1.

Since the visit to Ray my timing has improved massively and the Mazda has shown occasional signs of profound metaphysical understanding. Sing along with me now. 'This is the dawning ……..'

Comments

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Posted by canadian payday loans , on Friday 2nd July 2010, 6:00 AM


This is inspiring Motion.We must all take note.My mechanic is called Bill probably after what he gives me every time he attunes my 205.Love light and peace from the lizard people.

Posted by Cosmo smallpiece , on Wednesday 18th February 2009, 8:48 PM


Well I overslept and missed the 7:25am love in.
Steve, why not make a film called 'Snakes in a van', it might perk up the old van's kundalini.

Posted by John (aka Jonault aka Jono) , on Saturday 14th February 2009, 7:32 PM


I'm with Jono on this one only I don't have a car and being a Gemini I'm in two minds about almost everything with the exception of Valentine's Day which is also tomorrow - I ignore it with a religious fervour.

Posted by tjj , on Friday 13th February 2009, 8:42 PM


It's Friday 13th today and if my car plays me up it's going to get a damn good thrashing with a branch. Anyway, we Scorpios don't believe in this mumbo jumbo.

Posted by John (aka Jonault aka Jono) , on Friday 13th February 2009, 7:46 PM


my old merc van's suffering from a very disappointing kundalini..do you know if ray charges vat on chakra alignments?

Posted by stevla , on Friday 13th February 2009, 1:27 PM


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