my life as a artist
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no success like failure
Sunday 27th January 2008 10:57 PM
This morning the Corinthians lost 2-0 to Leeds Independents, on an all-weather pitch at Oaklands sports centre. I think it was the plastic pitch that was the problem. Most of the Corinthians are descendants of warrior gods, whose super-human powers rely on direct contact with the vital terrestrial energies of the earth, so when we play on plastic we tend to be a bit crap.
I'm descended from Odin, on my Mums side, and have inherited his ability to inspire frenzy amongst my fellow warriors, by the use of poetry. In recent times, and especially against Pocklington, I've seen one of my well-placed, stirring stanzas send Bob and Derek into an orgy of robbie savagery, but this morning I just wasn't on it. Even though I was substituted for twenty minutes in order to compose it, my half-time sonnet was hackneyed and listless, and rather than winding Bob and Derek up into coiled springs of fearless aggression, it just seemed to leave them in a state of torpid angst.
The etheric love-milk that nourishes this sort of poetry is suckled from the million green nipples of grass that grace a proper football pitch's velvet bosom, and this morning was like trying to breast-feed through a polyester blouse. Hopefully, our soggy tit of a home pitch will have dried out by next week. Brian, who's related to the ancient Persian warrior god Verethragna, on his Dad's side, reckons there's a goods chance.
Comments
Apologies for the previous comment. For the past 2 months I have done this to try and establish if I would ever be able to comment again, and now at last I am able to ! Thanks Kate and Sidney Pi.
Its just a shame I have nothing worthwhile to say.
Posted by Biggish Shoe , on Wednesday 30th January 2008, 4:36 PM
zxzxzx
Posted by zxzxzxz , on Wednesday 30th January 2008, 4:30 PM
Did you get carpet burns instead of getting muddy?
Posted by John (aka Jono aka Jonault) , on Tuesday 29th January 2008, 8:54 PM
So your hippy football team lost again and now you're blaming the grass? Or was it just the quality of the grass?
Posted by Steve , on Monday 28th January 2008, 9:00 PM
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